What bloody good are product reviews on the web?
No one posts anything neutral, or indeed helpful. Our household has completely lost faith, interest and the desire to assign sentience to some of these people who write product reviews.
It's like:
Your child will love Froopie - he's your toddler's furry electronic pal!Review 1: I loved this product. Three weeks after my toddler got this, he got accepted to Harvard Business School and won the Nobel Prize for Literature. And when burglar broke in and tried to steal our stereo, our Froopie gnawed off his feet. I am so going to buy this for my niece!Review 2: This product is terrible and I would never buy it again, even if it was on sale. When my mom got it for my son Jubal's first birthday, it attacked and put him in the ER with 40 stitches and a broken clavicle. And before that happened I am pretty sure several minor demons came out of it and possessed my hamster and goldfish, because now they won't stop setting parts of the house on fire with their eyes. I wish I kept the receipt for this stupid thing!Please, if you're reviewing a product on the web, put something in there to indicate that you're aware of the ludricrous quality of every other review before yours - something sardonic and tongue-in-cheek perhaps, and then just keep to the facts. As you can imagine, I'd be more than a little put out if I'd listened to these idiotic review rants and
then discovered that I'd just exorcised my hamster for no reason (not that I'm complaining. Me? Never!)
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